Six Degrees of Awesome

I've been trying to think back to when my introduction to the Evil League of Evil Writers began. They didn't exist as the ELEW at the time, but it's a beautiful way to describe these fantastic people.

I guess it truly starts with the day I bought my Nook. I immediately went diving for low-cost books. I happened upon Wolfkin by Elaine Corvidae. I was so captivated that I immediately went out and bought ALL of her books that were available on Barnes & Noble.

Not many weeks later, a friend on Twitter mentioned her in an @reply. I lost my dignity. Friends, I was a scary fangirl.

Anyhow, Elaine introduced me to Dina James and Skyla Dawn Cameron. These ladies led me to Mundania Press and the serious dent in my wallet. The conversations and chatter over Twitter have made me positively giddy.

I knew Skyla edited for Mundania, but I didn't realize she wrote until an off-hand comment one day had me searching for her on BN. I discovered River, which led me to Bloodlines and beyond. Her last installment, Exhumed, made me weepy more than once.

Okay, Dina is something else. I know her far more for her Eviltry and knitting. But she's also an amazing writer. She wrote a YA book called All Wounds that had me grinning from ear to ear. Especially Billy and his car. ... Okay, his car.

Then Skyla introduced me to Sarah-Jane Lehoux. Her book Thief grabbed my attention and wouldn't let go. I may have done a little chair dance when I realized I could go right on to the next book. 

So, here are a few authors that Twitter found for me. I hope you take a look at their work and enjoy it as much as I did.

Sundance - Taking out the Trash

Grak bowed his head in aquiesence. She continued her glare for a full second before she whirled away.

"Stupid, show-off orc," she muttered to herself as she stomped her way to the dazed-looking survivors. "How am I supposed to top that? Inconsiderate, I tell you." She kicked a downed body in the plate armor to get their attention.

She gave a satisfied smirk when every last one of them cowered away. A small part of her brain realized that they thought she was the one who'd thrown lightning at them, but she ignored it. "Well, I can't help but wonder why you fine men were chasing after us with bare steel," she kept her voice just loud enough for all of them to hear.

She waited until the whimpers died down. "Now, seeing as  you're a bit... indisposed, if you should begin hobbling back the direction you came, we won't feel the need to finish what we've started. Deal?"

She stood imposingly while every last man turned tail and limped away. The fact that a twelve-year-old weaver's apprentice would be intimidating to them didn't trouble her in the slightest. She watched them until they disappeared into tiny specks on the horizon.

Then she stomped back to the orc. "Well? Keep walking."

Sundance - Taking Turns

She raised an eyebrow at Grak. She opened her mouth to say something, anything. The words, when they finally came, were choked and disbelieving. “Small magic?”

He shrugged. “I did not get them all,” he said apologetically.

Kajivar pulled her short sword from the saddle sheath, unhooked the small round shield.  “Well, it’s only fair that I get the rest, right?”

Grak started to protest. “But, Warrior, you-”

She glared at him. “Stay here,” she snarled.

Sundance - Small Magics

Grak lowered his head in acknowledgement, and turned away. Kaj started stripping away her furs. She tightened the ties on her body armor, adjusted her pauldrons, and readjusted her war skirt so it was no longer quite so personal. She tied her hair back with a strip of leather.

A chill down her spine was the only warning before lightning struck. Heat flashed across her back a split second before thunder crashed through to her bones. Her hands felt frozen, halfway between her hair and her weapons.

The smell hit her first, the odor of seared meat churned into nausea in her gut. Slowly, she looked over her shoulder.

Sundance - Visitors!

Welcome to another installment of Sundance, my unedited brainchild that won't leave me be. I'm happy to have you all reading. Though I am curious about the readers. Especially the one from Russia. Feel free to introduce yourselves, I love knowing my words are read. Mostly because my ego is terribly needy.

~*~

"Warrior?" Grak's voice sounded far away, and surely she imagined the concern she heard. "Warrior, I would ask after an injury I may have missed, but it appears that some patrons from the inn last night have something to discuss with you."

Sound returned all at once, angry shouts and the clang of armor on running bodies. "Oh, that doesn't look very good," she said dully. "I suppose I should stand then?"

Grak grasped her arm and helped her up. "If I may, warrior, there is enough room here that I may perform some small magics for defense."

Kajivar nodded. "You do that while I straighten out, I think my armor has taken a crawl up my backside."

Sundance - Sense of Direction

"Hey, stupid, stop," she mumbled. The horse froze in his tracks. Kajivar slid to the ground, holding tight to the saddle horns as her knees didn't want to work right away. The orc was a bit blurry on the other side of the saddle. "You got a name?" she asked.

He huffed in what sounded like amusement. "I am Grak."

"I was a bit drunk at the time-" and might still be a little tippled- "but do I remember you using sorcery?" She couldn't keep the incredulity from her voice. Orcs weren't sorcercers. It just didn't happen.

Grak simply nodded. "I have been a student of sorcery for some years."

Kajivar just nodded. "So..." She looked around, but everything was still blurry. "Where are we going?"

"I am heading to pay my respects to the Kra'kish," he said. "You are welcome to join me."

She wasn't sure how it was possible to stumble when one was standing still, but Kajivar found herself on her ass at the gelding's hooves. Her head swam with too many emotions to identify. Except despair, that one was familiar and unmistakable.

Sundance - Hangover Memories

It wasn't the first time she'd woken face-down over a saddle, Kajivar admitted to herself. Though it was a bit of a change not to be tied hand and foot. Booted feet under muddy brown robes walked at the gelding's head. Kaj struggled to remember who it might be.

Oh.

The orc.

The tavern.

Her people.

Pain shot through Kajivar's body at the memory. Though two years passed, the burning loss felt new and raw.

Two years exactly, with this sunrise.

This bright, bright sunrise. Kajivar gripped the pommel of her saddle with one hand while she fumbled in the saddle bag with the other. She was pretty sure there was at least one left.

"Such action is not advisable, warrior," the orc rumbled.

Kaj grabbed hunks of hair to move them out of the way so she could glare. "What would you know of it?"

If he was smiling she would have to kill him, hang-over or no. "At least as much as you know of me," he said quietly.

Sundance - Grak to the Rescue

Grak sighed heavily. If he was honest, he was rather glad she'd passed out before his big confession. He retrieved his tray of herbs and crouched next to the warrior woman to begin his healing.

The innkeeper stomped in as he finished. "I thought I told you to get the hell out," he snapped.

Grak sighed again. "The warrior needed a bit of healing first, good sir," he said placatingly. "We will vacate your establishment momentarily."

The dwarf stared at him like he'd sprouted another head.  "Just get off my property," he rumbled, irritated.

Grak sighed. "Of course, good sir." He lifted the warrior's saddle from the stall and turned to the horse. The gelding flattened his ears at the orc. Grak mimicked the gesture and let out a warning growl. The gelding lowered his head and blew at the ground. Grak saddled him with no difficulty.

No, the difficulty was in getting the horse's master into that saddle. Grak eyed her slumped form critically. He poked the furs around her shoulders. They were a bit dirty, but not infested. He used them to wrap her up like a sausage and tied her belly-down over the saddle.

It would be most displeasing if she died of the cold after he'd healed her wounds.

Sundance - Who We Were

The orc approached her, a cautious look on his face, ears at half-mast. "You, know something of orcish shamans?" he asked carefully.

Kajivar slid down the stall wall as a happy buzz filled her ears. "Was part of the Sundance tribe," she mumbled. "Neighbors with the Kra'kish."

He shook his head. "I am afraid I do not understand," he said. "I know of the Kra'kish, but not the Sundance. I a from the far West. I was once of the Gu'shun."

She started to snore, but the sound woke her. "Long way from home, ain't you?"

His ears flattened all the way to his skull. He sighed. "I no longer have a home among my people," he said.

But Kajivar didn't hear him, the drink proved stronger than she was. Her snores didn't wake her this time.

Sundance - Make Good the Escape

The Orc waved her apology away. “An easy mistake, given the circumstances,” he rumbled, voice crackling like fire over gravel. “I thank you for your intervention, warrior. Would you allow me the honor and let me tend your wounds?”

Kajivar’s eyebrows rose up into her hairline. “Didn’t think they let shamans go,” she said quietly. She turned away abruptly, stomping into a stall. The horse head-butted her in the shoulder, she shoved him back. She rummaged around in the hanging saddle-bags grumpily.

She grunted with triumph when her hands closed around a cool clay flask. She yanked out the cork with her teeth and guzzled a third of the liquid inside. As the world tilted sideways, she threw her arm over the horse's neck. The ensuing whinny sounded suspiciously like laughter.

"Shut up, you. Just because you couldn't chew through the cork this time. Ungrateful wretch..." she mumbled into his mane.

Sundance - Dwarves are Touchy

It was only when the barkeep lost his temper that Kajivar realized she’d made a mistake.

“YOU!” the dwarf shouted as he kicked her in the knee. “Take your pet Orc and get out of my tavern!”

She was startled to find a mirrored look of utter confusion on the Orc’s face. Not in the mood to argue with the man who provided the alcohol, she grabbed the Orc by the shoulder and herded him through the unconscious bodies on the floor and out the door.

She didn’t stop until they reached the stables. Kajivar released him and took a few steps away. A bit of a blush may have crept up her skin under the grime. She rubbed the back of her neck and didn’t look at him.

“So, uh, sorry for mistaking you for an employee,” she apologized.

Grak - The Orc

Grak felt a headache developing between his eyebrows. It curiously resembled the tiny barbarian woman in front of him in shape. He was quite certain he could have talked the other men out of violence, he was just here for nightly shelter.

Had she really called him a “boy-whore?”

He couldn’t help but admire her... efficiency, as she kept her body between him and the rest of the patrons. She took some hits, but that only seemed to make her fight harder. Grak pulled his pack from its sling across his back and crouched to start inventorying the ingredients he would need for some decent healing magics.

Here's Sundance

Sundance being the working title of this stupid story that dropped into my lap, whole hog, no thanks to Kevin Lovelace. The market for high fantasy is absolute crap, but I want to write this anyway. My other projects should really be my priorities, but this one won't leave me alone. So I'm giving it to you, one scene at a time. This is raw and completely unedited, but I hope it makes you laugh.

~*~

Kajivar had reached that level of drink where everything was hazy and beautiful, and she was moving at three-quarter speed. Which was good, because if she'd landed that punch on the bartender he'd probably have quit serving her. Instead she raised another full tankard of piss-water ale to her lips and wondered if anybody was up for a fight.

She leaned back against the bar, glad of her furs between her back and the splintery plank. She blurrily observed the room, trying to figure out which of the other patrons wouldn’t mind a good tussle of violence. When she saw a group of men hassling one of the Orcish whores, she knew she’d found a target.

She had a soft spot for Orcs, right in the nostalgia bone.

She pushed her way through the tavern patrons, raising her voice above the din. “Get out of my way you worthless lot!” She elbowed her way right up to the man hassling the Orc. She gave him the courtesy of a shoulder-tap before she planted her fist right in his face.

She cackled with glee and followed up with a knee to the groin of his friend. His other friend thought her hair might be a good place to grab and got a handful of spikes instead. They were hard to make out in the dim light, given the layers of dirt and grime.

That’s when she got a good look at the Orc. Her brow wrinkled in confusion. “When did they start hiring boy-whores?”

She missed his response due to the fist connecting with her jaw. She rounded on her assailant with a roar, keeping her back protectively to the Orc. Part of her seriously considered hiring him after this was all over.

If she could scrounge enough coin from her fallen enemies. It was the lean season.


~*~



ETA: I will be updating on Sundays and Wednesdays, if everything goes correctly.

Elaine Corvidae - Lord of Wind and Fire

I first discovered Elaine's books purely by accident when I first got my Nook. I was so in love with her first series,Lord of Wind and Fire, that I immediately bought the rest of her books too.

 We "met" through Twitter and met in person at InterventionCon. She has amazingly offered up autographed hard-covers of that first, amazing series for our auction.

Bids start at $10.

Yvaine Shawl by Vae

Vae is offering up yet another item of beauty, this Yvaine shawl. Dimensions are 51 inches across the top, 26 inches deep. Yarn is 100% merino - recommend handwashing in cool water, dry flat.

 

Bidding starts at $10.
Will be mailed June 6th.

Autographed - The Universal Mirror by Gwen Perkins

Okay, this one has me bouncing in my seat. Gwen Perkins has offered an autographed copy of her book, The Universal Mirror. She will make the inscription out however the winner desires.

Bidding starts at $15.

Cupcake Auction

The awesome Mistress of Cupcakes, Frito, has offered a dozen cupcakes-in-jars, flavor of your choice. This auction is limited to the continental US, given the expense of shipping foodstuffs outside of that area. I've had her cupcakes, and they really are quite brilliant and delicious.

Bids for these delicious beauties start at $25.

Fund Raising

So, I need to start this by telling you about my roommate, Kym. She's amazing. She's a photographer, a cook, she practically keeps our house cleaned single-handed because my brother and I are lazy bitches. She's also one of the best friends a person can have.

She also has some pretty severe asthma. As she is a student who works only part time, sometimes she can't afford her medication. With the merciless wrath of the Ohio River Valley this year, she's been surviving on a rescue inhaler.

So, I'm setting up a fund-raiser for her. There will be auctions, but I'm going to start with a donation button.


If you would rather use PayPal, the brother has graciously agreed to let us use his account.

 
Kym will be offering pairs of crocheted wrist warmers/fingerless gloves/mitts or scarves. She's flexible! We have a wide variety of yarns which are offered on a first-come, first-serve basis. Next season of Deadliest Catch might feature her hat-making skills!

Next up are the auctions! Bidding is open from now until 7pm EDT on Monday, May 28th.

I will be offering up for auction, some knitted jewelry. I use crochet floss, 100% mercerized cotton, a key charm, and two small buttons for closure.

The amazing Skyla Dawn Cameron, (OMG, you guys, BUY HER BOOKS), has offered a critique for our auction.

The most excellent Vae has offered up the Worlds of Whedon issue of SFX.

And now we have the quite talented Frito baking for us. She has offered a dozen cupcakes in jars, and man, are they amazing.

Eee! Another fabulous author, Gwen Perkins,  has offered an autographed copy of her book, The Universal Mirror.

And Vae has a second offering, a shawl knit in the Yvaine pattern. 

This one is just plain amazing, author Elaine Corvidae has offered an autographed hardcover set of her first series, Lord of Wind and Fire. 

Skyla's Critique

Skyla says:

I'm offering:

A critique of the first twenty-five pages (double spaced) of a fiction manuscript, any genre. I have experience editing and reviewing fantasy (and all sub-genres, including urban fantasy), science fiction, horror, mystery, romance, paranormal, and erotica (all sub-genres), and can offer advice on pacing, characterization, and general copyediting. The winning bidder many also send for critiquing his or her query letter with the manuscript pages.

About Me: Nicknamed “The Bitchstress Dreamkiller” by those who know (and sometimes fear) her, Skyla Dawn Cameron has been an acquiring editor for Mundania Press for four years and Senior Editor of Mundania’s imprints for three. She oversees the editing of science fiction, fantasy, horror, paranormal, romance, young adult, and erotica. Some hapless writers find her scary, but she suspects they lack a sense of humor. She lives in cottage country Ontario (Canada), where sometimes she drinks Fireball Whiskey at work and sings The Stabby Song a lot. Mundania’s website is www.mundania.com. 

Skyla is also an award-winning author and her kick-ass website is located at www.skyladawncameron.com


Bids start at $20.

Knitted Chokers by Me

So, first up for auction, knitted jewelry by me. There will be three, so if there are more than three bids, the top three win! The charms on the front are keys.

They're knitted with crochet floss, made from 100% cotton. The choices are black or white, with a two-button closure. Finished product will look something like this.

Bidding starts at $10.

World of Whedon SFX from Vae

Here we have SFX's World of Whedon issue. It's a Special Edition featuring a 14-page interview with Joss Whedon, articles about all of his original worlds and characters. There's even some info about the Avengers.

Bids start at $10. Will be mailed June 6th.

In Which Your Author Is A Tease

One of my characters has developed a very strong voice, but she's not scheduled to appear in the book I'm currently writing. This did not make her happy. So I've started writing a side-story to show you, my beloved readers (all two of you), where she's come from and how she became the person you will meet in book two.

The series is what I like to call a Gender-Bending Arthurian Urban Fantasy. I leave it to you to guess which knight she is.

~*~

Virginia Gray stilled the hands of her girlfriend, clasping them between her much bigger ones. "Paulina," she began hesitantly.

The other girl froze, her smile turning uncertain. "Ginnie," she said back, uncertain. She tilted her head questioningly.

Ginnie brought Paulina's small, soft hands to her lips. She kissed them with a sigh. "I'm going to the recruiter on my eighteenth birthday," she confessed.

Paulina's forehead wrinkled in confusion. "But, you can't," she said. "The Army won't allow lesbians," she protested.

Ginnie closed her eyes and pressed her forehead to Pauline’s hands. “The Marine Corps, and I can, under the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy. As long as I don’t let anybody know. I’ll need to be completely celibate.”

Pauline jerked her hands away. “You’re breaking up with me?” she exclaimed in disbelief. “Over the Army?”

Ginnie lowered her hands to her sides. “To serve, to get out of Detroit. Yes.” She could never really vocalize her burning desire to go into the military, to serve her country and its ideals. She could only do, not say.

Pauline’s temper rose like a storm. “How can you be this selfish? You’re going to get out of Detroit? And leave all of us peons behind, right? Back to being Little Miss Perfect. Back in good grace with your parents, with the church, all works out for you, right?”

Ginnie hesitated, struggled not to cross her arms over her chest. “Pauline, you- you’re so much smarter than me. Than anybody in our class, if you wanted, you could be gone in a year,” she said quietly.

That only made her angrier. “So now you’re calling me lazy, unambitious.” She turned away in disgust. “You know, that’s fine. I’m glad this came out now. Better to know what you think of me sooner rather than after I got really involved.”

Ginnie’s eyes widened. “No, Pauline, that’s not-”

“Yes it is!” she shouted the other woman down. “You do mean it, don’t try to slither out of it now, you snakey bitch.”

“Pauli-” she tried one more time. She didn’t want it to end like this, in anger and feelings of betrayal.

“No, I’m done with you.” She’d turned from fire to ice. “You’ve made your opinion clear. Just don’t talk to me again. Ever.”

The world receded a little bit as shock coursed through Ginnie’s veins. It glued her body into place, wouldn’t let her reach out as Pauline stomped away. The door slam blew a soft breeze in its wake, brushing Ginnie’s face to make her blink.

That... really hadn’t gone as planned.